Why Happiness Is So Elusive…And How To Embrace It
Reading Time: 6 minutes
June 28, 2019 By T. Harv Eker 1 Comment
Do you believe your happiness is a choice?
Consider this carefully, because how you answer determines your potential for a happy life.
And the key part of the question is not the “happiness”. It’s the belief.
If you want to be happy, you have to believe it’s a choice for you.
Why? Because believing it’s a choice supports being happy.
Beliefs are not true or false or right or wrong. But they are either supportive or unsupportive of what you want.
If you can understand this, then you don’t have to take beliefs so seriously– whether they’re your own or someone else’s. You can CHOOSE what to believe.
And when you do, you have POWER.
Choice puts you at the steering wheel of your life. If you’re not at the steering wheel, where are you? You’re in the back seat. You’re in the side seat. Maybe you’re in the freakin’ trunk!
If you want to be in charge and empowered, then you need to choose your beliefs carefully.
And if you want to be happy, you need to believe your happiness is your choice, no matter what!
That’s my belief, and I encourage you to try it out for yourself and see what results you get.
To help you, here’s a declaration I want you to say out loud 3 times. Then write it down and put it somewhere you’ll see it every day.
“My happiness is my choice.”
June 28, 2019 By T. Harv Eker 1 Comment
Do you believe your happiness is a choice?
Consider this carefully, because how you answer determines your potential for a happy life.
And the key part of the question is not the “happiness”. It’s the belief.
If you want to be happy, you have to believe it’s a choice for you.
Why? Because believing it’s a choice supports being happy.
Beliefs are not true or false or right or wrong. But they are either supportive or unsupportive of what you want.
If you can understand this, then you don’t have to take beliefs so seriously– whether they’re your own or someone else’s. You can CHOOSE what to believe.
And when you do, you have POWER.
Choice puts you at the steering wheel of your life. If you’re not at the steering wheel, where are you? You’re in the back seat. You’re in the side seat. Maybe you’re in the freakin’ trunk!
If you want to be in charge and empowered, then you need to choose your beliefs carefully.
And if you want to be happy, you need to believe your happiness is your choice, no matter what!
That’s my belief, and I encourage you to try it out for yourself and see what results you get.
To help you, here’s a declaration I want you to say out loud 3 times. Then write it down and put it somewhere you’ll see it every day.
“My happiness is my choice.”
If you want to be happy, you have to believe it’s a choice for you.
Awesome, now here’s the next critical thing you need to believe if you want to be happy: happiness is natural!
Happiness Is Natural For You, But Not For Your Survival Mind
Yes, I believe happiness is natural… you’re already happy until you make yourself UNhappy.
How do you make yourself unhappy? With your thoughts… and more accurately, with the thoughts that you maintain and entertain.
When you start monitoring your thoughts, you find that literally 95% of them are fear-based. It’s unbelievable! But it’s how our mind works.
And unfortunately, fear and happiness do not mix.
Fear takes you away from your happiness. It dissipates your happiness energy. If you allow a negative, fear-based thought to persist, you allow yourself to be unhappy.
However, you do have a choice– not about the thoughts that bubble up in your head, but about which thoughts you allow to stay there.
As my good friend Robert Allen said, “No thought lives in your head rent free.”
What does that mean? It means you’re going to pay for the thoughts that reside in your head. And what do you pay with? Your happiness.
Imagine a random person comes to your front door and starts telling you all the bad things that might happen to you. You could simply say, “Thank you for sharing. That’s nice. I’m not interested. You need to move on.”
But if you invite them in, have a conversation with them, feed them, entertain them, start letting them stay over all the time, now you’ve changed the game.
If you do this with a fear-based thought that shows up in your mind, you’re the one who’s allowing it to stick around and eat all your happiness.
But here’s an important point: don’t make the mistake of dissing your mind for having fearful thoughts. The reason your mind is always looking for what could go wrong is because that’s its job.
It’s there to protect you. And you can thank goodness for that because it keeps you alive.
Your mind is like a bodyguard. Imagine your bodyguard said, “Hey, be careful. Something’s wrong over there!” Would you say, “Shut up, you annoying bodyguard!”?
Not if you wanted to stay alive! So don’t say that to your mind. Remember it’s an important part of you. If you yell at it for affecting your happiness, you’re adding more negative energy… and you’re just going to make yourself more UNhappy!
Now here’s another declaration I want you to say out loud 3 times. Then I want you to write it down and put it somewhere you have to see it every day. It will help you balance protection and happiness. Here it is:
“I appreciate my mind for keeping me safe, and I choose what thoughts to entertain.”
Awesome, now here’s the next critical thing you need to believe if you want to be happy: happiness is natural!
Happiness Is Natural For You, But Not For Your Survival Mind
Yes, I believe happiness is natural… you’re already happy until you make yourself UNhappy.
How do you make yourself unhappy? With your thoughts… and more accurately, with the thoughts that you maintain and entertain.
When you start monitoring your thoughts, you find that literally 95% of them are fear-based. It’s unbelievable! But it’s how our mind works.
And unfortunately, fear and happiness do not mix.
Fear takes you away from your happiness. It dissipates your happiness energy. If you allow a negative, fear-based thought to persist, you allow yourself to be unhappy.
However, you do have a choice– not about the thoughts that bubble up in your head, but about which thoughts you allow to stay there.
As my good friend Robert Allen said, “No thought lives in your head rent free.”
What does that mean? It means you’re going to pay for the thoughts that reside in your head. And what do you pay with? Your happiness.
Imagine a random person comes to your front door and starts telling you all the bad things that might happen to you. You could simply say, “Thank you for sharing. That’s nice. I’m not interested. You need to move on.”
But if you invite them in, have a conversation with them, feed them, entertain them, start letting them stay over all the time, now you’ve changed the game.
If you do this with a fear-based thought that shows up in your mind, you’re the one who’s allowing it to stick around and eat all your happiness.
But here’s an important point: don’t make the mistake of dissing your mind for having fearful thoughts. The reason your mind is always looking for what could go wrong is because that’s its job.
It’s there to protect you. And you can thank goodness for that because it keeps you alive.
Your mind is like a bodyguard. Imagine your bodyguard said, “Hey, be careful. Something’s wrong over there!” Would you say, “Shut up, you annoying bodyguard!”?
Not if you wanted to stay alive! So don’t say that to your mind. Remember it’s an important part of you. If you yell at it for affecting your happiness, you’re adding more negative energy… and you’re just going to make yourself more UNhappy!
Now here’s another declaration I want you to say out loud 3 times. Then I want you to write it down and put it somewhere you have to see it every day. It will help you balance protection and happiness. Here it is:
“I appreciate my mind for keeping me safe, and I choose what thoughts to entertain.”
Fear takes you away from your happiness. It dissipates your happiness energy. If you allow a negative, fear-based thought to persist, you allow yourself to be unhappy.
How To Get Happy Now
Are you happy right now?
If so, why is that? I believe it’s because you’re not allowing negative or fear-based thinking to get lodged in your head.
But suppose you were thinking something like: “Oh, shoot, this is what I always do. I let my fear-based thoughts take over my mind! I’m such an idiot. No wonder I’m unhappy.”
That’s you dissing yourself. You’re criticizing yourself, and you just made yourself UNhappy.
How long does that take? Maybe a quarter second. Poof! Your happiness dissipates.
Here’s what to do instead:
1) Say The Four Magic Words
Notice when you’re feeling a little tense or irritated. If there’s an obvious thought there, say the four magic words: “Thank you for sharing.” This is a neutral way of letting your mind know it’s been heard, so it can relax.
If you’re not aware of a particular negative thought, just say, “Hey, I caught myself getting unhappy.” You don’t have to analyze it or figure out why you had the feeling. Enjoy the fact that you caught yourself, and just let it go. Blow it away and come back to the present moment.
As an added bonus, say something nice to yourself: “Good job! I’m getting better at choosing happiness.”
2) Next, Replace The Fear With Trust
But trust in what?
The two greatest things you can put your trust in are yourself and the Universe (or God, Spirit, or Higher Power if that works better for you).
So how do you trust yourself? You say, “No matter what goes on, I trust that I can handle what is and what will be. I can handle anything that happens.”
When your bodyguard brain says, “Hey, look out. Be careful,” you respond, “Thanks, don’t worry. I can handle this.”
Then there’s trusting the Universe. You practice the belief, “The Universe works for me. The Universe is not my enemy. The Universe is there to support me, not to hurt me.”
A lot of people believe the Universe is conspiring against them. That the world is against them, people are against them, the government is against them. Everything is against them!
These are the most disempowering beliefs you could ever have.
You have to change the story. When something doesn’t go how you want, think, “There will be something in here that benefits me. I don’t know what it is yet, but the Universe works for me.”
Now, is it true the Universe works for you? No! It’s not true. But it’s not false, either. The Universe doesn’t usually send us super clear signals. If you someday see a green checkmark in the sky, take a picture and send it to me. Then we’ll all know. Until then, it’s a freakin’ belief!
But it’s an extremely empowering belief you can choose to adopt… just like the belief that you can handle anything that comes your way.
Here’s one last declaration that will help you build these beliefs. I want you to say it out loud 3 times. Then I want you to write it down and put it somewhere you have to see it every day. Here it is:
“I trust myself, and I trust the Universe.”
(or God, Higher Power… whatever has meaning for you)
How To Get Happy Now
Are you happy right now?
If so, why is that? I believe it’s because you’re not allowing negative or fear-based thinking to get lodged in your head.
But suppose you were thinking something like: “Oh, shoot, this is what I always do. I let my fear-based thoughts take over my mind! I’m such an idiot. No wonder I’m unhappy.”
That’s you dissing yourself. You’re criticizing yourself, and you just made yourself UNhappy.
How long does that take? Maybe a quarter second. Poof! Your happiness dissipates.
Here’s what to do instead:
1) Say The Four Magic Words
Notice when you’re feeling a little tense or irritated. If there’s an obvious thought there, say the four magic words: “Thank you for sharing.” This is a neutral way of letting your mind know it’s been heard, so it can relax.
If you’re not aware of a particular negative thought, just say, “Hey, I caught myself getting unhappy.” You don’t have to analyze it or figure out why you had the feeling. Enjoy the fact that you caught yourself, and just let it go. Blow it away and come back to the present moment.
As an added bonus, say something nice to yourself: “Good job! I’m getting better at choosing happiness.”
2) Next, Replace The Fear With Trust
But trust in what?
The two greatest things you can put your trust in are yourself and the Universe (or God, Spirit, or Higher Power if that works better for you).
So how do you trust yourself? You say, “No matter what goes on, I trust that I can handle what is and what will be. I can handle anything that happens.”
When your bodyguard brain says, “Hey, look out. Be careful,” you respond, “Thanks, don’t worry. I can handle this.”
Then there’s trusting the Universe. You practice the belief, “The Universe works for me. The Universe is not my enemy. The Universe is there to support me, not to hurt me.”
A lot of people believe the Universe is conspiring against them. That the world is against them, people are against them, the government is against them. Everything is against them!
These are the most disempowering beliefs you could ever have.
You have to change the story. When something doesn’t go how you want, think, “There will be something in here that benefits me. I don’t know what it is yet, but the Universe works for me.”
Now, is it true the Universe works for you? No! It’s not true. But it’s not false, either. The Universe doesn’t usually send us super clear signals. If you someday see a green checkmark in the sky, take a picture and send it to me. Then we’ll all know. Until then, it’s a freakin’ belief!
But it’s an extremely empowering belief you can choose to adopt… just like the belief that you can handle anything that comes your way.
Here’s one last declaration that will help you build these beliefs. I want you to say it out loud 3 times. Then I want you to write it down and put it somewhere you have to see it every day. Here it is:
“I trust myself, and I trust the Universe.”
(or God, Higher Power… whatever has meaning for you)
The two greatest things you can put your trust in are yourself and the Universe.
The Secret To Happiness And Empowerment
If you want to be happy, I strongly suggest you make these beliefs YOUR beliefs. Practice them every day! Use the declarations in this lesson and claim the power to choose happiness.
The Secret To Happiness And Empowerment
If you want to be happy, I strongly suggest you make these beliefs YOUR beliefs. Practice them every day! Use the declarations in this lesson and claim the power to choose happiness.
https://www.harveker.com/blog/how-to-embrace-happiness/?mpweb=343-8065968-663232917
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